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Boiled down to the beautiful slight dish of steak tar-tar that it is, “Underworld” is the acknowledge to the two fright flick questions you had as a kid:
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1) If Dracula and the Wolfman went mano a mano and fang-to-claw, which one would do the thrashing?
2) If Dracula and the Wolfman checked into a cheap motel, got roaring drunk on a case of Night Assert, and had a baby, what would it glance like?
You glean the retort to #1 early and often, which is lovely mighty what this Transylvania Space is all about. And by the ruin of “Underworld” you derive #2 as well—and trust me, when it’s hopping about like an grisly green Mini-Hulk (upright down to its one-size-fits-all-monster trunks) you’ll wish you hadn’t.
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You want to know what you’re getting when you lace up your thigh-high attitude boots and strap on that trenchcoat for a minute midnight fun in Len Wiseman’s uber-stylish diminutive monster mash “Underworld”?
Think West Side Story: only here, instead of the Jets and the Sharks angling for a rumble on the other side of the tracks, we have Vampires and Werewolves. Oh, and in “Underworld” nobody breaks into song. Both sides unbiased want to rumble, and the girls fair wanna have fun. In the meantime, while not the sharpest stake in the vamp-hunter kitbag, “Underworld” finds its groove, and serves up a bloody two hours of unabashed techno-cool that drinks you dry, trashes the apartment and howls at the moon.
We earn dropped into the middle of a war that Celine (the impossibly tasty Kate Beckinsdale) —our supple full-body-suit clad vampiric Death Dealer and narrator—tells us has been “raging for centuries.”
On one side of the tracks: the sneering, brutally hip Euro-trashy leather-trenchcoat & hip-sunglasses wearing uber-high-maintenance Vampires. They have posh high-rent neo-Victorian digs, drive around the streets in Jaguars and Maseratis, and have managed to switch up the silver bullets in their glocks and MP-5 submachine guns for something more lethal: liquid silver nitrate, which makes it tougher for their hairy buddies to pull the bullets out. Advantage: Vampires.
On the other side of the tracks: the Salvation Army surplus-wearing tear-your-scalp-off-and-wear-it Werewolves—erm, I mean Lycans, short for Lycanthropes. The Lycans are strictly low-rent, hang out together in what looks like an abandoned public lavatory, and remove a bath once every fleshy moon whether they need it or not. Whereas their blood-sucking cousins from the East Side observe like they’d be hanging at crazy underground raves when they’re not dumb each other to tears talking like the Merovingian, the Lycans are strictly the mosh-pit site. Oh, and from what I could bid, there’s not a single werewolf girl. C’mon guys—haven’t ya heard of “Ginger Snaps”? Bummer. Advantage: Vampires.
That said, the boys have been pumping the rent money they’ve saved up into super-science research, giving them bullets that encase super-photoelectric magnesium charges (perfect for giving that oncoming vamp a small taste of Club Med sunlight) . They also have the upper hand in figuring out how they can mix the bloodlines, bringing the war between Vamp and Lycan to an kill. Advantage: Lycans.
And finally, mixing it up with our fanged-kissin’ cousins, we have perplexed med student Michael Corvin (played by the annoying Scott Speedman who cashes a check) stalked by Lycan heavies and tagged by Selene, who wants to know why the werewolf army is so fervent to secure their hands on him.
And that, sparkling powerful, is “Underworld”: two hours of movie built around jaw-droppingly lovely set-pieces and bouts of total war between locked-and-loaded squads of Things that go Bump in the Night.
Just a note: you’ll want to gather the Unrated Extended DVD: it fleshes things out, beefs up some supporting characters, and ends with an extended battle sequence—and it’s loaded down with plenty of extras you can sink your fangs into.
Plus, the sleeker transfer shows off Wiseman’s technical mastery in spades. Wiseman uses sound-stages and CGI to anchor the film’s sight, and tethers all of it to the fog-shrouded cobbled streets and frail alleys of Prague: the City itself takes on a bleak and brooding character. The movie looks gorgeous: whether it’s the sunless red-velvet and shaded mahogany halls of the mansion, the sleek, sterile Underground, or the industrial ruins of the Lycans, Wiseman and cinematographer Tony Pierce-Roberts produce every scene order. The sequence where a locomotive corpulent of vampire diplomats chugs into a deserted rail-station—with the baying of werewolves in the distance—is jaw dropping.
“Underworld” also gets the most out of its talented stable of actors. There are three centers of gravity in the film: Beckinsdale, who doesn’t need her bodysuit to allege her lines (though I’m happy she wore it) . The Lycan overlord Lucien (the gifted Welsh actor Michael Sheen) steals every scene he’s in, and brings complexity and inform to a role that could have been a throwaway in lesser hands. Finally, there’s the Vampire King Viktor, played by the expansive Bill Nighy (who also played Shaun’s Jag-loving stepdad in “Shaun of the Boring”) . Nighy is a kind of demonic embodiment of immortal Puritan rage, and acts like a champ through all that make-up.
Even the supporting actors turn in strong roles: Shane Brolly (Kraven) whines and pouts and lisps and turns in a convincing performance as a spineless worm; Sophia Myles (Erika) comes off as a playful petite vampire cat-girl; Kevin Grevioux owns this film and puts the smack down as Uber-Werewolf Raze; and Hungarian actress Zita Gorog rocked my world—without uttering a single line.
In the slay, this batwinged black-lipstick wearing looker of a flick charged into the goth club of my choice, served me an extra-bloody steak tartar, smacked me around, bought me drinks, and talked Shakespeare after. Would a Lycan by any other name be honest as hairy?
Blade was involving, but to me it failed emotionally. You fair do not connect with the film on the personal level. The effects were elegant, but that was the main impact…”wow what incredible effects”. You feel like breaking out in a chorus of Peggy Lee’s Is That All There Is. Special effects alone cannot compose a movie titanic.
Underworld makes that jump, gigantic FX work, but also gives you characters you really care about, ones that you really admire to abominate. A strong dwelling line designed to hook you and retain you, unprejudiced does that. With the emotional involvement, there is a greater impact, a movie that will put a question to explain viewing. Instant Cult Plot.
The movie grabs you from the opening and never lets up with the tear. Firm direction and with a driving rep, the movie reaches for perfection. You have a 1000-year-old war between Lycons and Vampires, and it’s all coming to a head. It’s a well opinion out and executed premise and Kate Beckinsale shines! She is an incredible talent. I first adored her work in Wintry Comfort Farm as Robert Post’s child Flora. When you compare that gentle, deft bit of humour with this kick a*** vampire hunter, it proves what an overlooked talent she is. With Van Helsing out now (and I am definite this movie led to her landing the role), she is finally getting a spotlight she so well deserves.
A shadowy, atmospheric ambiance to the whole movie is maintained all the blueprint through, adding a strong foundation for the otherworld premise. I am definite some will nitpick things, as all vampire film faces, but kudos for the vibrant energy and sheer edgy feel to the film.
It leaves you hanging, clearly commence for a sequel…one can but hope it maintains this high quality.
Kate rocks…you don’t need to know anymore! It has about 13 minutes of footage not in the modern. A tremendous battle scene and some backstory on Michael. Rounds out the film nicely without dragging it down. A large pounding soundtrack, too!
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